patelyne

Okay tiniest bit of explanation for those not following TWNZ. There is a clone of Jack named Yancy. Yancy got a little friendly with the TARDIS and became ‘with coral’ (read: pregnant) Working theory is that the actual TARDIS (read: mommy) kidnapped the coral from him and travelled back in time to give it to Jack to raise in the hub.



Look at that family photo. Least Jack could have done is smile. Sheesh.
And here’s a lovely solo portrait (Who's a cute baby TARDIS? YOU ARE!!)



So in messenger one day I spouted a random … something. From Jack to his grandbaby coral:

Sand and oatmeal. You're lucky little one. You get a smooth surface and a heat lamp. I had grit and the searing sun. Sure I shove you off the desk occasionally, but Grandda's got needs
Ianto always apologizes and dusts you off after. Toughen up.
---
Couple days later in messenger:

Sue: g'pa, do you haz any new tales?
Me: *thinks*
Seems weird to raise his own grandkid. Grandkid that looks exactly like his own child with her would have looked. Funny thing, genetics. Guess he didn't miss the opportunity after all.
*adjusts desklamp for optimal exposure to the rays*
Sue: aww - does the grandkid have a name?
Me: not yet
Sue: that's shamefull
Me: says the dad
(she is Yancy, after all)
Sue: in yancy's defence, the TARDIS ran off with him/her/it
---
Now this one I started in my notebook to share, but I never finished it. I actually stopped mid sentence AND CAN’T REMEMBER WHERE I WAS GOING WITH IT. It was two weeks ago, but still.
CAN ANYONE HELP ME FINISH THE LAST SENTENCE?

One sided chats with Grandda (continued)

Don’t deny that polish sorted your growth just there…more than the miracle grow that turned your side yellow. I was trying to help. Really.

Oh stop that pouting, I can feel it from here, whether you’ve got lips or not. You’re half Harkness and we can’t be contained by biology. Every grandfather wants his … Grandson? Granddaughter?

*experimentally picks up coral looking for any new or more pronounced dimpling or … anti-dimples*

Whichever you are, anyone would want you to grow up faster.

You’ve had hundreds of years as it is. When I was a kid we were put out on our own most days as soon as we could walk. Okay bad safety example considering your uncle. Just avoid any time lords looking for a new set of wheels you’ll not be taken away. And if you do see a Timelord? The Doctor? Save us both a lot of trouble. and 1000s years growth time, shell building, travel time with constant sidetrips- Oh I know your mother. No sense of direction coming from that side of the genepool.

But like I was saying, save us the trouble and
-----
And what? WHAT??
HELP

My most favorite spy friend personal french teacher morgia has written another Torchwood squirrel fic for my very own birthday. It features the little stone garden squirrel above that came with the house we just got - She's famous now!!

I ORDER YOU ALL TO READ THE STORY IMMEDIATELY-YOU WON'T BE SORRY!!
It is very awesome & hilarious and she is wonderful and sweet to write it for me!!!

Never trust a squirrel in love <-- click it!!

WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE? GO!! READ IT!!!

STILL HERE?
Well I guess that good, because I want to make sure you also check out this amazing Jack/Ianto art by kath_ballantyne (I still LOVE that tie pulling!)

I am surrounded by totally talented people. You guys are awesome! Thanks again to everyone :D

Quick rundown of what I’ve been up to now that I’ve gotten over being crazy sick for so long…
After this I’m off to catch up on all the reading I’ve missed. amand_r especially - she's been busy with some amazing stuff!! Worst part about being sick was having all the free time but being completely unable to focus.
Also - Not sure if he's around to see this, but... HAPPY BIRTHDAY NICK!

(  The most random of all posts ever (with pictures!) )

It was a slow day at work, and I got bored. I suppose I could have cleaned up, restocked, taken inventory … any number of productive things. Instead I wrote this – The thinky thoughts of Patelyne Alemp, acting medic for ask_twnz. I’m calling it a fic, because I don’t really know what else to call it. Blame it on ask_theharkni, I figured if the clones are all thinking about themselves then maybe I should too.

( When RP leaks into a person’s actual journal…. )

[Error: unknown template qotd]

The Ask-Verse Fake Wake, DUH!

See?

I don’t even know why I’m posting. I am so … arghh… all my words are gone. It’s like my very first post when I just sat at my computer trying to stare down the blinking cursor. As if it’s going to fix anything…As if it will bring my words back. As if…

( CoE Day Four spoilers - Believe me, happy clappy I am not )

Title: The Importance of Helmets in Child Care
Character(s): Jack/Ianto, OCs Henry and Sarah (once again borrowed from the ever generous tardistenantsue )
Rating: PG
Spoilers: None
Notes: Just another bit of silly. In case you haven’t been following Year of the Cat (And why not?!) let me introduce Henry. He would be the little boy that Ianto and Jack have been charged with taking care of for the last little while due to some…unfortunate circumstances. tardistenantsue has been kind enough to let me borrow her people again, including what we found out about Jack‘s babysitting skills here. I promise to stop stealing her people away eventually. Honest. After a craptastic last couple days I thought some silly happy fic wouldn’t be a bad idea, hope you like it.

( What is it about the helmets! )

Title: Spare Change
Character(s): Ianto
Rating: PG
Spoilers: None for TW (maybe a tiny blip of a Doctor Who Spoiler for Season 4?)
Notes: Ianto thinks to himself while putting in some time sorting through the archives. Thank you to tardistenantsue and candybree for both pushing me and putting up with my whining. You guys are the best!!

( Ianto was definitely going to have to revamp the archive system again )

Non-Author Note: Here is this thing that I hate - not really sure what to call it…too short to be fic…I don’t know (remember? Not a writer) I’m not even really sure why I wrote it and where it came from, other than the fact I sat too long in the rain yesterday morning. I’m sorry to have made Ianto all mopey, especially as I myself don’t particularly like him to be. Please don’t hurl hate at me as I was forced to post this by my “wives” who claim to like it. So thanks (I think) tardistenantsue and candybree

( Here I make Ianto sit in the rain )